Motherhood

I often see other mothers around me and immediately compare myself to them. I wonder why I can't be more like them. Why don't I speak softer like that mom or have a schedule like this mom or make perfect meals like the neighbor mom or keep my house spotless like the lady with 5 kids across the street? I never felt good enough. Never felt like I was doing it right or keeping up. And it was STRESSFUL and DEPRESSING. But after 5 years of trying to keep up and always feeling a step behind, I'm finally realizing something. I'm not those other moms! We are all different, and we are going to raise our children in different ways. And here's the kicker! IT'S OKAY! No really, it's okay! Just because the neighbor doesn't let her child have sugar doesn't mean I'm a bad mom because my children get a treat every afternoon. Nor vise versa! We are both doing the best we can to raise happy and healthy children! 

Unfortunately, I've come to find that there will always be people who think I'm doing things wrong and that I'm a bad mom.  My initial response is, again, feelings of depression and inadequacy as a mother. And then it hits me! IT'S OKAY! NO REALLY! IT'S REALLY OKAY! An unfortunate part of the agency that God has given us is the ability to be mean, cruel and judgmental. Its just going to happen. There will always be someone who thinks they know more than I do and can do it better than I can. Whether its the neighbor who thinks they hear everything but really hear nothing, the lady who gives me dirty looks at the store, or a even friend or family member, it's okay. I know I'm doing the best I can just as any other good mother would do. Am I perfect? No, not by any means. Thank goodness being a good mom doesn't require perfection!

Someone posted this on Facebook the other day. Isn't it so true? What would it be like if we were to withhold judgement and show more compassion and understanding toward one another?

I have successes and failures every day - sometimes EPIC failures. Again I am NOT perfect - I'm a work in progress. And so are my sweet children. Together we make mistakes and learn from them as we go. We scream, we cry, we yell, we throw fits (and yes by 'we' I mean me too! I'm working on it...), but also we laugh, we giggle, we hug, we kiss, we play, we color, we cuddle, we read, we learn, and we grow TOGETHER! 

Playing in the leaves at the park! J found them very fascinating.

I love these kids from the bottom of my heart. Our lives aren't perfect. There is A LOT of crying, whining, complaining, temper tantrums, massive melt downs, and time outs.  Being a mom is HARD.  It's just plain hard! And sometimes I want to cry (or I do cry) and wonder if I can keep going, but look at those faces? Isn't it worth it? Absolutely, indeed. 100% guaranteed! I have never questioned my decision to become a mom or even my decision to become a mom 3 times. Yes, its hard! But people do hard things all the time right? I can do hard things! And I can enjoy the blessings these 3 little souls bring into my life while doing it! Motherhood is the best career choice I could have ever made! 

Lily Turned 3 Today!!!!

RANDOM PICTURES OF THE WEEK

GRANDPA COOK'S FARM

Every year before Halloween Grandma and Grandpa Cook have a big family night at the farm and let the kids pick out pumpkins for Halloween! I also came home with lots of squash and a cabbage! Yum! I didn't take a lot of pictures because it was chilly outside but here are a few of them playing with their cousins on the small pile of hay bales.

PRESCHOOL

Super blurry, but she's showing me the bat she made in preschool.

Cute bat finger puppets!

 JACOB

I found this frog hat and frog slippers at the dollar store. J loves the hat, but HATES the slippers. We can't keep anything on his feet. He doesn't like it, so he rubs them until everything falls off. Hope his feet don't freeze all winter!

LILY'S BIRTHDAY

I felt like Lily was a little young to worry about having a huge kids party for her birthday, but after Crystal's party all she could talk about was having a birthday party of her own. So we just invited some of her preschool friends over for a small get together on her birthday. I tried to keep it pretty simple. Just pizza, cake, and ice cream. I didn't plan games or anything. We just let them play in the toy room for entertainment which the kids loved, so it worked out well!

THE INVITE

THE CAKE

PIZZA

MICKEY/MINNIE MOUSE EARS

I don't know why but my phone took the worst pictures. I guess between bad lighting and wiggly kids, it just wasn't cutting it today. 

SINGING

She blew out the candles in the middle of the song, so I missed it! Oops.

Ty relit them so I could get a better picture (but its blurry, can't win! lol)

PRESENTS

Getting ready to open presents! (I didn't get pics of eating cake. Sad I know.)

I couldn't keep up with her so I was just snapping pictures left and right. 

Between her party and dinner we went to the rec center indoor toy area with her friend Jackson, and they played for a good 2 hours!  She LOVED that it was HER day! (But I didn't take a single picture- lame I know!)

DINNER

 For dinner she wanted to go to Red Lobster (okay okay I may have influenced this decision a little bit, but just a little- I had a coupon that was expiring -lol) When we walked in, they were unpacking a shipment of lobsters! It was only a 5 minute wait, but the girls 'pet' the lobsters and watched the lady bathe them while we waited. Lily was especially fascinated by them!

They sang Happy Birthday to her and brought a lobster to be their mascot! She LOVED it!

One last feel before going home!

PICTURES OF THE WEEK

I had so many pictures this week that it gets its own post!

I thought he was adorable in the monster hat. He on the other hand wasn't so sure.

CRYSTAL GOING DOWN THE BIG SLIDE!

 

I read Green Eggs and Ham one night for bed, and the next morning we decided to try some!

First day of dance class!

I found J like this when I opened the back door.

For a month or so now, J likes to throw his toys and try reaching for them. He can get on his knees and then sit back up. If he falls on his tummy, he gets stuck and rolls over. He hasn't started crawling yet, but he seems to slowly get around somehow. I haven't actually SEEN how he's doing it yet. lol.

I LOVE Crystal's natural highlights. The contrast in the colors of her hair shocks me sometimes.

Yes, I enjoy torturing myself. But the more we do it, the better they get at listening to directions. (By 'they' I mostly mean Lily. lol). Lily wasn't covered in flour when we were finished this time so we are making progress!

I walked into the room to find this the other day. Ty had just folded a load of towels, but they were still sitting in the living room. Sometimes I wonder why we bother folding things at all. lol. They just end up unfolded on the floor. (Each towel was a different room of their pretend 'house').

Frosting haunted house cookies the next day!

Naturally Lily needed to throw in a good camera pose. lol.

The girls play outside EVERY afternoon with the other kids in the complex. I chat with the other moms while they run off some energy! (I'm afraid for winter. No really. I'm very afraid for winter. These girls NEED their outside play time). Anyway, we looked up from our conversation (something wasn't right... it was too quiet) to find this! They were sitting in a circle playing a game together (Duck Duck Goose I think). It was fun seeing them collaborate like that without an adult to lead the way!

Yep, Lily and her goggles!

I LOVE this picture. Its one of my new favorites of Lily. She just couldn't get any more adorable ... goggles and all! (When did she stop being my baby and become a little girl? This growing up thing is hard!)

Another movie night. This time Aladdin! And J stayed up to join us!

Wrestling on the floor. I think J is winning!

LOVE THEM!